For most people, this is the toughest time of year to be single. Let me offer those of you that are single a positive spin.
Finding a way to be comfortable alone is a huge step toward finding the kind of relationship that will be truly satisfying and really last. Being able to find strength in your identity as an individual in paramount. I truly believe that you can’t know if someone is right for you until you know yourself. The way to find out who you really are is the same way as you get to know someone else. You need to spend some time with you.
This is also a time to see that there is much more to life than just a romantic relationship. A romantic relationship should enrich your life, not be your whole life. The holidays are a great time to remind yourself of this. People are generally more friendly and giving. Take time to enjoy your family, children, or friends. Concentrate on the positive things around you. Find reasons to be happy about your life.
People are drawn to others that are confident in their identity. It’s comforting to others when they know that you know who you are. It means that they can learn what to expect from you, and know where they stand. It’s a form of security, and everyone wants to feel secure in their relationships. You will make yourself much more appealing. People will want to be around you and with you. When others know that you are comfortable and confident on your own they are more likely to want to find out why, and less likely to try to take advantage of you. It’s a funny phenomenon of human behavior. When you don’t need someone, they tend to try a lot harder to make themselves wanted and needed. We have all heard of, or been part of, a story about a guy treating a girl poorly and she just keeps coming around despite of it all. (It goes the other way too ladies.) In addition to that, don’t forget about the phenomenon of finding something only after you stop looking.
Concentrate on you. Focus on the positive. Stand tall and build your strength of self.
Happy Holidays and best of luck in the New Year.
C. Christian
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