There are a lot of men out there that are going to be pissed off as a result of some actions taken by some of you that will read this. I could lose my guy card for this ladies, so please listen up and make it worth it.
There is a certain order to things. In this case it's respect and then sex. It doesn't often work out the other way around. If you are going to try to sleep with the men that you date, and then try to get them to treat you with respect, you are going to be very frustrated.
Men tend to be simple minded when it comes to relationships. When the relationship starts the first thing a man wants to do it get you in bed. We want to sleep with our coworkers, our female friends, and every attractive woman we pass on the street. You are no exception. It's because men are very sexual. Our egos drive us to sexual conquest. We see you as a sexual object, a vessel of pleasure and satisfaction of the ego.
However, men can be and want much more. Men are capable of being nurturing, supportive, emotionally available, sensitive, etc, etc, etc. You just have to get yourself past the point of sexual object in our minds. Once a man starts to see you as more then sex, then he will start to get to know you as an intelligent person, and not just as a pair of tits. If you can get to this point, then you can get the respect. Sex is much better when you're confident that you're much more to him.
If you sleep with a man right away, then you take a real chance of forever banishing yourself to the realm of booty call in his mind. If you sleep with a man before he has really earned it, what motivation does he have to get to know more about you? Why would he even try to? He is getting what he wants. It's the old adage of "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" I don't care what he tells you, you will have forever affected the way he sees you.
I remember a girl that I dated that slept with me right away. She was a very nice girl and I really liked her. In retrospect, I could probably have had a great relationship with her. It could have been so much more. The problem was that I never gave the relationship the chance. I was getting what I wanted when I wanted it. I never respected her, and never saw her as more than a sexual partner. It's the nature of men.
So, what's the right way to use this amazing weapon??
Use that sex appeal to get a man interested. Be sexy. Be sexual. Just don't be sex. Not right away anyway. He will be drawn to you for your sexuality. He will stay because of that sexuality (at first.) Use that to your advantage. Talk to him. Get him to talk to you. Do things together. Date! Let him get to know you as a person. Let him find other things that he likes about you, OTHER reasons to stay (besides sex.) You will be amazed at how long a man will stick around without getting sex. If you can get a man to stick around and want to be with you when you aren't sleeping with him, then you have something!!! Then, knock his socks off in bed. He will be yours, hooked!
This will also weed out the junk; the men that will call you a tease or try to push your limitations. Don't give into these guys. These are the ones that only want one thing. Guess. If you really like a man and don't sleep with him, then he calls you a tease and leaves, avoid the temptation to be heartbroken. He may have been great to look at and a lot of fun, but if he leaves now (before you sleep with him) he would have left anyway. He'd probably do it after your feelings were involved. The men that are going to stick around and get to know you are the ones you are going to want to get to know.
Here I go again. Raise your personal value. You are a rare commodity. If you are giving that commodity away, then it has no value. Make it hard to acquire and only the best will be able to get some.
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